Surely He Jests

Doofus

Could somebody please tell me what kind of drugs this idiot is on?

“I know that they all probably assume they have better, much more important, urgent, timely, things to campaign on, but I sure would like to get their individual takes on the new video game that one company is marketing to fifteen year old boys.”

“It’s called “Mass Effect” and it allows its players – universally male no doubt – to engage in the most realistic sex acts ever conceived. One can custom design the shape, form, bodies, race, hair style, breast size of the images they wish to “engage” and then watch in crystal clear, LCD, 54 inch screen, HD clarity as the video game “persons” hump in every form, format, multiple, gender-oriented possibility they can think of.”

Either this guy is seriously misinformed, has confused Mass Effect with some other title, or is simply lying in an attempt to escape the pit of obscurity by demonizing the game industry and gamers themselves (Jack Thompson-style). Whatever the case, I have a feeling that last possibility is spot-on.

What say you?

About the author

Fatsquatch

Discovered as a young 'Squatchling in a Pacific Northwest woodland area in the mid-70's, Fatsquatch was soon domesticated and introduced to the fledgling arcade scene, where he became addicted to the magical sights and sounds of gaming. As years passed, his addiction only worsened, and eventually lead to his desire to write about all things gaming from a veteran point-of-view. Hence, Fatsquatch created The Jaded Gamer in 2001, and set about leading it into permanent obscurity.

Readers Comments (3)

  1. Here’s a laughable follow-up from Kevin McCullough — the author of the article featured above — that’s worth a read:

    http://kevinmccullough.townhall.com/blog/g/ad4fece3-3a1e-42bd-8546-295599024191

    • Somebody ought to send him an email thanking him for shedding light upon this curse facing American families, and ask him to write another one spotlighting all the immoral stuff that goes on in Metal Gear Solid 3. Then if he does, we could pass the link onto the MGS message boards and let those lunatics gnaw on him for a while.

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